funny images

funny jokes 2..

For the 1st time , someone has written something good for men also..... !!

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Ⓜ Who is a MAN

A man is the most beautiful part of God's creation who starts compromising at a very tender age.

He sacrifices his chocolates for his sister.

He sacrifices his dreams for just a smile on his parents face.

He spends his entire pocket money on buyng gifts for the lady he loves just to see her smiling

He sacrifices his full youth for his wife & children by working late at night without any complain.

He builds their future by taking loans from banks & repaying them for lifetime.

He struggles a lot & still has to bear scolding from his mother, wife & boss.

His life finally ends up only by compromising for others' happiness.

If he goes out, then he's careless 

If he stays at home, then he's a lazy

If he scolds children, then he's a monster 

If he doesn't scold, then he's a irresponsible guy
If he stops wife from working, then he's an insecure guy

If he doesn't stops wife from workin, then he's somebody who lives on wife's earnings 

If he listens to mom, then he's mama's boy

If he listens to wife, he's wife's slave

Respect every male in your life. U will never know what he has sacrificed 4U.

Worth sending to every man to make him smile & every woman to make her realize his worth!!

HAPPY MEN'S DAY"
Which never comes..

2.Who said landline phones are out of fashion?

Buy a Samsung mobile,
Sara din charging mein laga rehta hai,
Maa kasam landline wali feel aati hai!! 

3.Russia 19 attempts,

USA 21 attempt
India just 1 attempt and that's a success.
No wonder we are the country with one of the highest population!!! 

4Reaction after india's succesful mars mission:-

Alia bhatt = Ab 'MARS' wali chocolate aur bhi sasti ho jayegi..
Rahul gandhi = Mein mars se chunav ladunga...
Priyanka Gandhi = We should change the name of mars to Rajiv Gandhi Lal Grah..
Anil ambani = my ipl team cricketers will be from MARS. i will name it after my wife's name 
"MARS TINA HOTTERS".
Sonia Gandhi = Martians should be declared as Minorities...
Kejriwal = It is illegal step by Modi's government to conquer mars. Hum MARS par dharna karenge..
Geelani = We want Mars free from India...
Chidambaram = Mars is a Special Economic Zone area. It Should be given to Robert Vadra..
Akhilesh yadav = Mars par Uttar pradesh se jyaada balaatkaar hote hai. Hamar media naahi batavat hai..
And the best statement comes from pakistan

Bilawal Bhutto = Hum Mars ka ek ek inch bharat se le lawange ....

5.Me: Bhaiya, Mangal (Mars) jaoge?

Pune Autowala: Haan, 900 crore lagega!

Me: Kyu? ISRO ne to 450 Cr me bheja.. 

Pune Autowala: Arey wahan se return nahi milta bhai..

6.Behind every successfull selfie.

.
.
.
.
.
.
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.there are 99 failed and deleted shots

7.In India.. on a bus stand...

at a book stall..
:
:
an american engineer
got heart
attack..
:
because..
:
:
:
:
he saw a book : "how
to become
an
engineer in 15 days"
worth rs. 15....

8.Girl : I want to breakup with you. You don't ever call me, you kutte kamina dont call me ever bye

Boy : Arre main busy tha, new Lamborghini Aventador liya maine
Girl : awwww! ?? My jaanu So cute ! Kab li ? Kaha hai ? Baby meet me na.
Boy : Laptop pe, NFS me.
Girl : Haraami Saaley 

9.Pati(patni se):- Hata lo..,apni chehre se ye julf ye
jaaneman
.
.
. .
.
.
.
.
. .
Khuda kasam..,,agli bar khane me baal aaya to...
Sajni se gajni banane se muje koi nai rokegaa...

10.Pati(patni se):- Hata lo..,apni chehre se ye julf ye

jaaneman
.
.
. .
.
.
.
.
. .
Khuda kasam..,,agli bar khane me baal aaya to...
Sajni se gajni banane se muje koi nai rokegaa...

11.Usko Na aaya Hamari wafa ka yakeen

Humne kaha hum mar Jaayenge
Aur usne kaha-
mar Jaa
.
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.
.
.
fir
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.
( ._.)
<) )
_//fir kya??
Bezzati ho gayi....

11.bahut puraani baat hai....

Ek african apni family k sath jungle me hi rhta
tha....
usane kabhi mirror nahi dekha tha..
1din jungle me use shisha mila.
Usme khud ko dekh kr smjha k uske baap ki
tasvir h
aur. wo use apne ghar le gya or roz bate krne
lga.
Uski biwi ko shak hua,
1din jb uska pati bahar gya hua tha to usne
shisha bahar nikala
aur apni shakl dekh k boli :
"Accha..
To ye h wo Kal-muhi
jis se mera pati baaten krta hai"
Usne sheesha apni saas ko dikhaya,
To Saas boli :
"chinta mat kar ..
Shukar mana...
buddhi hai,
Jaldi mar jayegi

12.Joke time...

Wife Taaro Ko
Dekh Kar Boli:
'Wo Konsi
Cheez Hai,
Jo Tum
Roj Dekh
Sakte Ho,
Par Laa
Nahi Sakte..??

Husband::
Padosan.!!!

13.Twinkle, twinkle, little stars,

World is envy; we're on mars!
Up above the world so high,
We've made it in a single try!..
#Yaaaaaaayyyy !!
#Proud_To_Be_An_Indian

14.Not buying iphone 6,
.
.
Because-
.
.
.
.
.
.
it doesnt have pre installed 'snake' game

15.Aajkal 9th-10th class ki bachi se
bhi poochlo
uska bhi brkup ho chuka hota h
Bolti h m broken heart
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Mujhe toh samjh nhi ata h
inke heart kaun
todta h
.
.
Micky Mouse ya Donald

16.Usko Na aaya Hamari wafa ka yakeen
Humne kaha hum mar Jaayenge
Aur usne kaha-
mar Jaa
.
.
.
.
.
fir
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
( ._.)
<) )
_//fir kya??
Bezzati ho gayi..

17.Behind every successfull selfie.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.there are 99 failed and deleted shots

18.Exam main fail honay pay dad ne sirf
itna kaha..
.
.
.
.
...
.
.♡
.
.
.
big boss chate hain ki aap apna cell
phone aur
laptop hame de..

19.Me: 3G ki speed nahi aa rahi hai
Call centre : Kaunsa handset use kar rahe hain aap?.
Me: Iphone 5
Call centre: Apple ka iphone?.
Me : Nahi Amrood ka

20.OMG! it really works...
Step 1 - hold ur breath!
Step 2 - Hold it for 29 min.
Step 3 - Die!!